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Monday, March 28, 2011

Yankees starting rotation named, just not very exciting.

     So say what you will about old news, but I like my weekends off. Over the weekend most of the MLB set up their final lineups/rotations/etc., including the Yankees. Ivan Nova and Freddy Garcia as their 4 and 5 starters. It could be worse. Colon is going to spend the season in the bullpen, making calls to Domino's like some kind of Met and rolling out like a vaguely talented bowling ball. I'm kind of psyched to see Nova with like a half hour of Major League experience refusing to back down from the likes of Jose Bautista midway through a season where he murdered baseballs. Freddy Garcia is actually pretty good, and probably more likely to succeed than Colon, but also far less interesting of a story, so I'm going to leave it with something like "Freddy Garcia will be an OK fifth starter for the Yankees, not good, not bad, just OK."
     Far more entertaining is this Jose Canseco switcheroo involving his brother.I've always wanted to be a twin so I could pull shit like this. Going to my twins classes, switching girlfriends, blaming shit on him, it would be wonderful. The ultimate coup? Being able to send my twin brother to get his ass kicked when I ran my mouth a little too much. This isn't exactly what happened to the Canseco brothers, Jose just got lazy, or had some more careers to ruin, and sent good old Ozzie Canseco to fight some celebrity thing he had going on. He only got caught because not only does Ozzie have no neck, he is also lacking the lame tattoos that Jose has. Either way, they are clearly both idiots, but it's well worth it to see that Canseco (either one) is still running around doing ridiculous shit.
    On a final note, serious Bryan McCormick? Seriously? Marla fucking Hooch as your starting Second Basemen? I'm all about women playing baseball, A League of their Own is one of the best movies ever, but Marla Hooch? You can do better than that.
    P.S. Drafted my fantasy team this weekend...killing it. Bring it nerds, The Great Hambino's are destined for a repeat.

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