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Sunday, September 4, 2011

Have you guys seen this show called Hoarders?



Hey sorry about this shitty fucking week of posting. Its been nuts Bro Namath the fucking blackout and working like a champ for 6 days in a row. So this has taken a back seat to making money, sorry gotta make that paper.

But let me get into what the title says. I am going to take a break from baseball because I missed so much this week and it wouldn't be in the best interest of the readers. It would ruin my chances to win the peabody award or what every award you win when you are full of hot air.

Right so here is the fucking review. I finally checked out this hoarders show thats been on
the air for a few years. I am scared. I think I might be a hoarder, kind of. I am not as serious as these lost souls I am just super lazy and I still have the dressers that me and my brothers used when we were 5 and my clothes have grow a bit since those day. But seriously I am sitting here with a good buzz on because me and my brother just got in from our cousins Labor Day bash. So my brother puts on this show Hoarders on A&E. So this first episode I was 50-50 on. It was this like redneck lady and here picture of normality husband who said on t.v " Why do we need books I can't fucking read!" So the show is like a split where they have two people who are totally bat shit nuts the first part is the rednecks and the second part was some whacked dude who like arcade games but like the shitty ones not like Mortal Kombat and Avengers but like pinball and that lame ass horse race crap.

Right so this woman's daughter who is tat'ed up like a coloring book which is cool and all but honestly who is she to say that this person isn't normal, I get she is looking out for her mom and trying to help out but its kinda hard to take her seriously with a collar bone tribal tat, The illiterate Husband and the future hoarder son who loves to site on giant paper bags which look like it took more then 1 redwood tree to make. So they send this Therapist who looks like Sandra Bullock in the Blind side. So this Doctor is slowly talking to this inbreed and he cheese filled kids cry about how bad it is and they plug the dump truck. But the lady is freaking out
pretty bad and its sad.
But the other half of the first episode made me question the legitimacy of this show. So this guy has for years collected old school arcade games pinball, skiball, wacka mole, pretty much a lot of shit you see at Old school game rooms. So they bring in a doctor who looks like a bag lady and they start bullshitting about his collection and how he feels about it. He said they were like his children and boom he was labeled as a hoarder. So bag lady got this mover guy who was a huge douche. They were moving some hefty crap into another location which the
hoarder fella bought to open an old school type arcade. So Mover douche and Dr. Bag lady are going on and on judging this dude because he showed up a whole team of movers by moving the horse race base which weighed well over a ton by him self. They were all like " How/why did you do this by your self whats wrong with you?" and the guy was like " I put it in here with me and like 3 friends I know what it take to move it idiots," so the mover douche just blows up on him talking about respect . Which made me think the mover had some Un resolved issues with control ( which I kind of do as well, It's not really an issue when someone knows how to make a lineup and not have me pitch? What the hell) So after tempers cool they finish putting everything where it need to go because the hoarder took over the moving processes. So that made me think. This guy isn't a hoarder he just wanted his shit moved and some exposure for his out of date arcade. So this show is suspect

Another episode started up with these two old bitties who have had these fucking brutal lives. I mean just shit has piled on these poor women and they broke under the stress of it all and it was so sad.
This one lady Becky who was raised by here grandmother in Louisiana because her mother and father never wanted her. A story she told was when she was like 6 she had ammonia he dad kicked her off the couch and on the porch in the middle of a rain storm and he mother didn't care. So the grandmother took her in and raised her so when the grandmother died when Becky was like 17 she got the house and didn't touch anything but it was clean. So one Halloween her oldest son got into a fight with his girl and sped off in the night and crashed and died and she was done from that point on. Just a mess, she got evicted and all her shit was in 16 storage lockers. While her youngest son who has a knockout southern belle as his wife which makes absolutely no sense since he's a fat piece of shit. So they took in Becky and she messed up this girls house with her shit so we find out she isn't that classy as she ripped apart Becky who was spitting shit the whole clean up. I felt bad for Becky, everyone shit on her, her kid, the belle, some douche doctor, some rando fat lady who was all about throwing shit away and the guy who owned the storage lockers. The fat lady who I think was a doctor called up the storage guy and asked him to talk to Becky about something. Just poor Becky.
The other one took place in Palm springs Florida. So this lady was a typical she was a knock out when she was younger married money, had a few ungrateful idiots and lived it up down in the sunshine state. So what caused her to snap was in 1993 her Mother, father, husband and one of her kids died with in 6 months of each other. How terrible is that? What would you of done if that happened to you? So her other kid and his "artist" wife ( she's crazy) who got fired in the 08 recession so they live in a fucking shed on his mother property. Now the place if it was clean and up to code would be baller. The lady had a fucking Dalorina , the back to the future car so you know she did blow back in the day. But we get to know this family we find out that the lady is drugged up hard, the son is probably a murder, rapist or meth addict and the wife is bat shit insane. But they clean it out with no problems except for the Texas chainsaw massacre vibe you got.

As I am writing this I am saying to my self "Holy shit I am a hoarder of Words !" But I needed to explain this shit out. This show makes you feel so bad about your self especially if you haven't cleaned your room in like a month. But check that shit out its nuts. Plus its cool to check out how people live under the Mason Dixon line.

p.s- I do find it funny that the network that shows Hoarders and spends their own money on treating these people has a show called Storage wars which is a show of assholes buying up Hoarders shits and selling off to other Hoarders. One hand washes the other on A&E

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