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Tuesday, March 6, 2012

I enjoy the sound of bats hitting balls... Wait I mean baseballs

                              

     Sorry other sports but baseball actually started! No more shitty playing against colleges that turned me down (thanks a lot Emily Dickinson College for female writers ...wait what ?) I kinda feel that would have worked better if this was a vlog  but I am radio handsome and video adorable or not but whatever real baseball is happening as I type on the West coast because it's 11 here in Ny.

    Lets talk about it lets dive in to hit head first. The Yankees are good and the Mets aren't . Well, that was fun I'll be back later in the week good bye. Feels good to be back.  Lets talk about something else... Hmm lets see that thing called a Snooki  is pregos and everyone is pissed of about that because it's unrealistic that someone who is 2 foot tall can get knocked up or maybe they are mad because someone who goes to bars and tries to pick up the lowest form of a human to take back to here clap shack to make the beast with two backs and probably not take the safest journey to the end ( I am trying to find words that sound not as gross as saying getting fucked raw  but I am failing )normally ends with a baby no matter how many of you idiots who watched the show that made her famous in the first place might object. Speaking birth control and gremlins.  I just heard that Rush Limbaugh wants to watch some random college girl  have sex because she thinks insurance companies should pay for birth control which I don't see a problem with but thank God Oxy is covered, am I right ( at this time I would get a right winged high five) or he has some odd view on what contraception is. I am not an expert on the inner workings of ladies but if it keeps them from having unwanted pregnancies, contract illnesses that contraceptives have been know to fight off  and helps them out in the long run I  am cool with it , I mean insurance companies cover Ritalin and other drugs like that and thats just legal speed. I never have heard women say "Hey you want to get high ? I am covered so I can get a shit load of birth control pills so I can sell you some pills for like $25 a pop," unless... Thats why girls roll in packs to the ladies room for illegal birth control pill deals , I fucking knew it. Finally did anyone watch sunday's The Walking Dead? How crazy was that ending , best show on T.V until this GCB takes off finally a show about the inner workings of banks during the economic collapse a comedic look  inside the largest economic disaster , I wonder who will play Bernie Madoff  ? Basic cable is terrible these days.



     Look I am not going to talk anymore then what I did about those past topic because anymore and you'll see how much I truly don't care about them. Its just so hard to focus on other things when baseball has started.  Right now I am so desperate for real baseball I am watching the least exciting spring training game ever... which is the most absurd thing I have ever said because pretty much all spring training games are knock out boring but this one might have taken the cake. Even the homer announcers are so bored all they are doing is reading numbers and names , they are not even trying to fill the dead air with a bullshit story about the time they show something kind of  interesting once. The game by the way is the San Francisco Giants who are tremendously over rated with their  pitching staff who seems to not be as "dominate" as they are hyped to be and their zero offense, seriously I have seen teams going through the Little League world series have better hitters then these jackoffs against the Milwaukee Brewers who needless to say might be the least favorite team in Arizona right now. Not just because Ryan Braun cheated and got away with it then spit in the presses eye with that mockery of a press conference but because they thumped them during the playoff last year pretty bad even though AZ was basically fire with neck tats. How many Arizonians you think "mispronounced" Nyjer Morgans name last year? My dude Jim Joyce is calling this game , you know Jimmy he's the ass clown who blew Armando Galarraga's no hitter and makes that "STEEERRRYYKKKEEE" noise whenever someone doesn't swing. Oh yeah I don't like that dude but I respect his mustache that is a solid lip hat .  I can't wait till these two teams meet in the regular season so I cannot watch it. Burn.

    This is the start of St.Patrick's Week . I know the 17th is next week but  this is prep time for  really the 9-18th. For about a few years I have been trying to get more then like 6 people to admit that  March is Irish History Month. It is think about it  first off every ass bag who isn't Irish starts buying up green shit like T-shirts, hats, and Shamrock shakes  that shit goes straight to the Irish economy ( that is probably why it's so shitty the rest of the year ) ,   There is a spike in Jameson Whiskey , Guinness ,  Irish springs and Sun block commercials through out the month, and finally well I don't really have a good third one but Come on bro, St. Patrick's on a Saturday that means we finally get a real St. Recovery day and that is just a miracle from the Big Man himself.  I do of course mean Clarence Clemens  not the other guy , if it was up to him shit would be on a Sunday so St. Recovery day would be a Monday. Watch it's going to be a global  snow storm.  I can't wait I think the 9th I am going to start the week of festivities by seeing my favorite local bands with all my Irish friends, followed up by  the rest of the week pinching my pennies until Saturday shit show. If anyone wants to meet up on the 9th or the 17th I will be in Manhattan. You have to guess where and if you are one of the 29 people who follow me on twitter I will be posting incoherent tweets every chance I get. Here is a spoiler that I know I will tweet at least 4 times during my time in the Apple " Just saw my clone. I make a very ugly female but she is pulling off that fu man chu. I sad =-( " or maybe some misspelled shit I haven't drunkly made an ass of myself yet.... I am actually Irish thats why I am pumped my last name has the racial slur in it ... twice

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